Baldur’s Gate 3 is flooded with little secrets and hidden dialogue. Despite the fact the game’s been out for months, I’m still seeing players discover hidden exchanges, tucked behind weird progression orders and specific origin stories. Spoilers for the true identity of the Dark Urge lie below.
The Dark Urge is one of a few origin stories you can play in Baldur’s Gate 3. Unlike choosing to romp around the Sword Coast as, say, Astarion, you’re able to fully customise their appearance. They still have a fully-written backstory, though: their memories are gone and they have a dark urge to slaughter people in increasingly inventive ways. Turns out they’re a spawn of the god of murder, Bhaal, which explains all the unholy bloodletting.
That also means they technically own a piece of property within Baldur’s Gate by technicality—though I highly doubt Sarevok Anchev and Orin are members of the Homeowners’ Association. Getting that legally recognised to pay off a 10,000 purchase, however? That’s another story.
This dialogue, which was brought to my attention by Alternative_Gur_2100 on the game’s official subreddit (and recorded by Witch’n Crafts on YouTube) triggers if you accept Bhaal’s blessing, then visit the Counting House as the Dark Urge. The head clerk, Meadhoney, completely dismantles your bloody heritage in a few short sentences.
The Dark Urge isn’t even trying to hide their Bhaal-sent nature, they’re just proudly stating it out in the open—insisting that their family is one of the oldest in the city. A surefire hint that Meadhoney should maybe reign it in to save his neck, but he fearlessly replies: “Father not given out your allowance yet?” That father being the god of freakin’ murder.
There are three conclusions you could draw. One: Meadhoney doesn’t know what he’s talking about—he’s never heard of Bhaal, he doesn’t care, he has business to do. Two: Meadhoney knows about Bhaal, but he doesn’t believe you’re his child. After all, you don’t have the paperwork to prove it, and flesh gibbets aren’t legal signatures. Three: Meadhoney doesn’t fear Bhaal at all, which is mildly terrifying.
If you want to hear Meadhoney ask “Have you been paying your mansion taxes?” with the same smug, self-assured delivery of someone wondering out loud if you even own an air fryer, you can watch the video below.
It is, ultimately, a sign that money is a far more powerful domain than anything the Dead Three can muster. Darkness, Murder, Bones: all these things pale in comparison to the ever present force of capitalism.
This isn’t even necessarily a joke. “Waukeen’s wage”, that 10,000 gold payment, is named after Waukeen: a deity of wealth, trade, and smuggling. She’s an actual goddess in the setting, so Meadhoney may legitimately be under divine protection. Besides, inheriting that temple also means shouldering Orin’s financial troubles, so you’re probably better off. As commenter zeriia points out, the queen of identity theft was probably avoiding taxes, anyway.