If you were a companion in an RPG, what class would you be?

RPG classes often feel like a bit of a personality quiz, letting us choose the fantasy we’d like to embody, but what if you got all isekai’d into one and had to make do? Most of us, if we’re being honest, would be level one commoners with six hit points, but let’s play around in this space and give ourselves the benefit of the doubt: our ideal selves, playing to our strengths in a fantasy world.

If you were a companion in an RPG, what class would you be?

Here are our answers, as well as some from our forum (opens in new tab).

Lauren Morton, Associate Editor: Well speaking of isekai-adjacent stuff, I did watch a couple episodes of “I Don’t Want to Get Hurt, So I’ll Max Out My Defense” about the newbie VRMMO player who just stat dumps into defense and accidentally starts winning fights with her shield and thought “oh no, it’s me.” 

I’m not sneaky or fast enough to be the cool stealth thief character I always play. I’m not strong or very good at memorizing spells. Honestly, I’m just very stubborn, which is why I’ve made a few similarly stupid novelty builds in RPGs that should not (and don’t) work, so becoming some unlikely tank who can only absorb damage and use party support buffs is probably me.

Jody Macgregor, AU/Weekend Editor: I am old enough that when I think of traveling to a fantasy world I think of “portal fantasy” like Narnia and the Dungeons & Dragons cartoon instead of whatever isekai manga about being hit by a truck and reborn as a slime the kids are reading today. 

In which case I would be a wizard, but inevitably a rubbish one like Presto from the D&D cartoon, who casts spells by pulling objects out of a hat and is only useful when the universe takes pity on him and lets him find a use for the random birthday cake or whatever he just brought into existence. So yeah, wizard. I’ll be the one party member who doesn’t use Intelligence as a dump stat.

Lauren Aitken, Guides Editor: I’d be an archer who also happens to be strong in destruction and alteration magic (hello, yes, Oblivion would like it’s skills back). All sneaky-beaky then boop! Arrow in the face. Or maybe I’ll sneak up and set you on fire, who knows?

Ted Litchfield, Associate Editor: My go-to character is a sneaky thiefy Garrett type, or else a dark mage/necro depending on the ruleset. That’s not me though. In real life I’m big, strong, clumsy, and good natured, so I would absolutely be the Neutral Good human fighter you pick up in the first town who helps you tank the goblin caves. The world needs Alistairs and Carths, after all.

From our forum (opens in new tab)

Crapulence1337: I’d fall into a magician class of some sort. Namely because I’ll disappear when it gets heavy and show up again in time to celebrate the win.

No, but seriously, I’d go magician because most of everything else feels too human-like. It’s like eating at the same joints on vacation that you can at home; give me something different, something I can’t do already.

SleepingDog: I would like to think that I would be a Paladin but that is wishful thinking. I don’t think I could endure the training and praying to get there. Then there is the bit about being holy. In reality probably a Mage.

Zloth: Bard!

What? You don’t want to bring me along on the adventure? Well shucks, I guess I’ll just stay back here, safe in the campsite, while you go off to get chewed on by a variety of monsters. Be sure to bring back plenty of gold!

DXCHASE: Wizard/Magic, Necromancer, summon the dead to play with them.

Brian Boru: Archer/Ranger, playing a stealthy scout and overwatch kind of role. Hang near DXCHASE the necro, so he can resurrect me when needed

Colif: We don’t need no Zombie Brian Boru around here.

Kovanen: Some sort of Dwarven Warrior, carry around a big ol’ axe while drinking and complaining about everything. Would occasionally bring Zloth on adventures to reach things from the top shelf, while he serenades me of tales about the famous Brian Boru

Pifanjr: Fantasy: assuming the arcane language used for casting spells is just Latin, I’d be a wizard. Not that I remember much from the six years of Latin I had in high school, but there’s probably still enough knowledge floating in my brain to get a good head start.

Science Fiction: anti-tech tech specialist. As a tech specialist, I would know exactly how unreliable most tech is and would never trust any of it. For example, I could reliably defeat any AI by posing it a paradoxical question.

Post-apocalyptic: Scientist and repair guy. I’m not actually good at either, but I just happen to find a database containing a huge selection of manuals and DIY/how-to books.

McStabStab: Dogmeat. *woof*